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On March 2, 1982 distraught and filled with self-hate over his inability to stop masturbating, Kip Eliason, age 16, committed suicide. Before asphyxiating himself, Kip left his father a note:

Dear Dad, I love you more than what words can say. If it were possible, I would stay alive for only you, for I really only have you. But it isn’t possible. I must first love myself, and I do not. The strange feeling of darkness and self-hate overpowers all my defenses. I must unfortunately yield to it. This turbulent feeling is only for a few to truly understand. I feel that you do not comprehend the immense feeling of self-hatred I have. This is the only way I feel that I can relieve myself of these feelings now. Carry on with your life and be happy. I love you more than words can say.—Your son, Kip”

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